To Beg Breathlessly

I beg of you to ask the right question

I beg of you to ask how I am

And I beg of you to care when the response is of far more information, is far more of a display of emotion, than you expected

I would merely ask this of you but this is no request

I will beg upon my knees and you will remember my words when you lie down tonight to sleep

I beg of you to care for yourself

I beg of you to alter the way you feel about the beggar

We are all beggars and the being at which we beg most is most likely god

Some pretend there are many gods, some pretend there is one

Some pretend there is no god at all but I’d like to pretend that if gods exist they are the greatest celebrities of all and prefer their privacy and if no gods exist then there is little harm to come from raw belief

There is only harm to come about from our actions and the words pushed between our lips

and when harm does come of these we will accept any excuse that arises to tell ourselves what is necessary to push the day’s events to the side and trade blows with the next sunrise, the next meal, the next second that passes

The young are the most immortal of the mortal that walk among us

And time, every breath, draws our life away and we should be thankful for this gift in every instant that passes as there are far worse things that can take our lives

For our lives will surely be taken

To think that what I am saying now or what will happen in the hours, days, and weeks that will proceed matter is an ideal held high among us

An ideal that drives us to preemptive decay, an ideal that slows the erosion of our misperceptions of the world around us

Don’t you know we are merely the dream of a tick sucking on the flesh of the universe that is a cow awaiting slaughter?

Don’t you know that this makes no sense but tugs at you slightly as surely as it tugged at me when this was written?

And now at least one of you may beg of me

Beg of me the gift of more words upon this page

Beg of me to close a wound that I may have opened

Or open a wound that was not ready to be closed

Don’t you know the wisest of us know nothing but the most intelligent of us claim dearly everything we’ve read and learned and hold intelligence before themselves as a paper costume that must not be worn out in the rain?

We tell ourselves what we must to take what we internally insist is the proper turn at what is sometimes improbable speed

The limits are comfortable to live within and everyone including you will tell you what a good deed you’ve done staying within them

But to stride boldly beyond these limits resets them in others eyes so that they may fall within what you have just achieved so that you can stride boldly beyond this nonexistent boundary once again

I beg of you to know that these words of strength rise from the deepest pool of weakness and fault and I beg of you to plunge within its depths

So what is the point?

What is the point of all this madness that resides within us?

That resides within our lives

That will reside in the wake of our deaths and after

I beg of your forgiveness for I do not know

So if you find the point my friends, if you even imagine you have found a single variable in an equation that is infinite your only obligation is to share it

And this obligation will drag you through the mud and thorns of others opinions

Opinions change

Know others are as fallible as you know yourself to be

Also know that others shape your life

I am not meant to lead. I am not meant to follow. I am meant to walk long distances alone without taking a single step

The stairs of life are endless and often the mistake is to climb as many of them as you can

Often this drives one to a breathless life

You will die in this corpse clogged stairwell

But do not be afraid

For you are meant to

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2 thoughts on “To Beg Breathlessly

  1. 1:13 AM..gotta get up at 5AM to make bus..I am better cuz of yer poem…Do you tire of my abject adoration of all poems de Bill?

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